Muddy Monday

When I find mud this glorious, I know it’s going to be a good day. I started with a good belly dip and shake off.Moving to a slight side-to-side roll.

Culminating in a full-body, smack down in the mud, roll. I even made sure my head was fully covered! Even Caly was in awe this time! Mom was shaking her head–I wonder what was her problem? She said I looked like I had shaved all my hair except for a mohawk down the middle of my back. WHAT? I missed a spot? I have a strategy, in case you haven’t figured it out. First, you coat your body with glorious mud, then you find a pond! But not before a few rolls in the grass. I wonder if I could get a patent on the process? I could talk to Dad–he was a Patent Attorney before he retired. Belly rubs, please? Mommmmm, why won’t you give me a belly rub? You do it other times…..

Pee Ess: Dad laughed so hard about my patent idea that I even let him hose me down when we got home.  😦   I thought it was a pretty good idea, don’t you? What does he know?

What Happened at the Beach-revisited

Mom and Dad are suppose to come home today, but here’s another story I told you earlier:

Well, what happened, you ask? Let me tell you, it was a lot. This is going to be a LONG story, so you’d better sit down and relax.

Mom and Dad took Toby and me to Lincoln City not long ago–actually about a week ago. That’s on the coast of Oregon, in case you don’t know. I’ve been to the coast before, but the first time I was really little and don’t remember it. The second time was a disaster because Mom lost her keys in the sand. WOW, what a mess that was-she needs to get her head examined….(oops, don’t tell her I said that). We (Toby and I) had to ride in our car on this BIG truck, but it was OK–we just took naps.

This time, Mom said I lifted her curse. Ya’ know, everything comes in threes, or so they say. So, you ask, what was the first thing? One time, before she lost her keys and about the time I was being born, they went to the coast and came home and THEY WERE ROBBED. Now, I bet you are wondering what could have happened this time? Let me tell you.

When we got there, we went to Gleneden Beach so we could have fun and run and play. Did I tell you Toby II (and his sister Macy) were there too? They were! There weren’t very many human people, so we got to go off-leash (remember, I know “come”). That was so much fun–sand to dig in and Toby II. THEN I saw the water! This was like going to the river!! Here I come!!!!

That was one big river–not like the Sandy. And there was something Mom called waves–look at them! They were BIG! And something called seafoam. I thought maybe that was something I could eat–but it tasted a little funny. Mom said I can’t drink it OR eat it–it can make me really sick. Well, what is it?

So, I ran down into the water and this huge wave crashed over me–I came up spluttering. Oh wow, it was  BIG. Mom and Dad were SCARED (or so they said). They said I could have been caught by a sneaker wave. What’s that? I thought sneakers were something I could chew. They’re crazy….Give me a sneaker, I’ll show them!

Well, I guess it was something I need to learn more about. Mom put me on my leash and said I had to wear it on the beach until I learned about it. Well, they’d better teach me!

We stayed at this hotel that LOVES dogs. They even let me stay there! I thought that was pretty neat. Mom took Toby and me for a long walk and I played with Toby II and then we had to go to bed.

When it was really dark outside, Toby got up; got stuck in the bathroom and barked. Mom thought he needed to go pottie and told Dad. Dad got up; opened the front door and I raced out! Like I do at home, don’t you know? He didn’t know I was right there at the door. Silly Daddy!

Oops–where am I? This is not my back yard. Mom and Dad came out and kept calling:  “Sage, COME”. They sounded really scared, but I knew where I was. Did they? Apparently not–what was their problem? Well, I came, like I was taught. I just made them suffer a little–I was having fun exploring. Mom read her book for a long while after that, but I went back to sleep. What was the big deal, anyway?

Mom says this is what lifted her curse! Really? Does that mean we get to go back? Oh, wait! We still had another day! But I’m tired after all this writing, so you’ll have to wait.

Acorns are GOOOOOD

We have this HUGE tree in our back yard. It is so big that it covers all of our back yard. It is so big that it goes all the way up to the top of the sky! Mom says it’s an oak tree. I say it’s big. Bigger than me!

These fuzzy-tailed rats run around all over my tree. Mom calls them squirrels. I think they are fun to chase and Toby taught me how. I hear them calling us and we go racing out! They don’t let me get close, like our kitties do. They just run up the tree and chatter and chatter. Mom says they are scolding me for chasing them. Whatever…..

Well, these things fall out of the tree–I asked Mom what they were and she said they were acorns. I think the squirrels are throwing them at me. They think it’s fun and so do I. Sometimes I only find part of an acorn–how dare those squirrels eat my acorns? They should be all MINE. I’ll just have to chase them harder, I guess. Then they’ll throw more at me!!

When Mom sees me eating an acorn, she says “DROP IT”. When I do, I get a treat! Sometimes I don’t want to “DROP IT”, but I do because I like that treat better.

Mom said acorns aren’t good for me–they could be toxic. Toxic? What’s this toxic business? I don’t even know what that means. Mom says it means acorns can make me sick. Me? Sick? I don’t get sick. You should see all the stuff I eat! Mom says I have a cast iron stomach. I do! So how could they be toxic?

Yesterday, Mom said “let’s go out in the back yard”. I saw a fresh new acorn on the deck! YEOW! This acorn tasted funny. ICK! BLEH! I sure didn’t want to eat that. It didn’t even taste like an acorn.

What happened? Well, Mom had a secret. She got this stuff called Bitter Apple and she sprayed it on some acorns. And then she put them outside so I could try and eat some. Is she crazy? She RUINED them!!

See that acorn? It tastes funny.

What did she do????

This smells funny

This Bitter Apple stuff is NASTY, but they can’t all taste that bad. I know. I’ve been eating them for a while. Remember?

I bet I can outsmart her! My nose is better than her eyesight. I can find an acorn ANYWHERE! Aha, there’s one. Eewww, it tastes bad too. I’m not going to give up on this, let me tell you! Mom said she wasn’t either….

School

Before I was 4 months old, my family took me to a new place where I was suppose to learn stuff. It was a pretty neat place because there were three other dogs my age and I got tons of treats–I love treats. And we got to play! And my Mom & Dad got to learn stuff–oh, was I suppose to learn it too? I sorta paid attention, but when they gave me all those really good treats, I decided maybe there’s something to this learning stuff business.

By this time, I was buds with Toby and he said he’d help me with some of this homework I have to do. All this sitting and downing stuff. I have to sit before they feed me. I have to sit before I go out. I guess it’s OK as long as the treats keep coming. And I get to go back to class and play!!

I graduated from that class and was pretty proud! I had new friends and did what my Mom and Dad asked. But they said that wasn’t the end of it. I had to go back to school to learn some more stuff.

But in-between, I got to go on long walks and learn about the back yard. There are lots of sticks around–they keep falling out of the sky from this tree. So, I guess I need to help Mom clean them up by chewing on them.

Well, soon I was back in school. This time, I met a new bunch of friends. They were older than me, but that’s OK–I learned how to play from Toby. Boy, this time I got to eat some really good stuff–something called hotdogs. And all I had to do was run to Mom or Dad when they said Sage, NOW. And they fed me and fed me–I thought I was in heaven. Now is a good word.

I also learned another word, which was “come”. For that I got cheese. Isn’t this the dogs life? Do a little something to make Mom & Dad happy and I get cheese AND hotdogs! And Mom takes me for walks every day and I love walking right next to her. She pops a treat in my mouth a lot. None of that pulling and walking way ahead for me–I’d miss the treats! We also worked on walking in class and my teacher said I did very good. She was very proud of me. That makes me happy.

I don’t go to school any more, but I heard Mom and Dad talking about a new class coming up. I wonder what that will be?