I’m being EVICTED?

I heard the cats discussing how I like to get in their cat tree. Plus, they’ve been pretty sneaky here lately. Then, Mom spent all day at an attorney’s office and I heard her tell Dad they talked about an upcoming eviction. WHAT?? Now, wait a minute. Those cats are behind this. I just know.

I’m sure she was there to find out all my rights–she should have taken me, but she said “no dogs or cats allowed”. WHAT??? I thought this was Portland–Portland LOVES dogs. Besides, I’m her client, not those cats. At least I’d better be.

That's me in the lower condo

That’s Mystic down at the foyer. The penthouse is above me.

See the penthouse? It’s often empty, but sometimes Mystic is up there. She also stays down in the foyer to scratch her paws on the sisal posts (sisal’s a big word that Mom told me about).

Well, Thailing was in the penthouse one morning when I got into the lower condo. She had a F-I-T. What’s up with that? She usually sleeps in the kitchen WAYYYY up on top of the pantry. Does she think she has sole rights to this place? Mystic is usually up there and she is OK with me in the condo.

See what I mean?

OK, where’s their contract on this cat tree? Or do they have a long-term lease? Are they current on their rent and condo fees? If they can’t cough up anything more than a hairball, maybe I’ll have a chance for the lower condo!!

But, I need to know my rights. Maybe I’ll be a SQUATTER!! Good idea, huh?

Mom says in Oregon, a squatter has to “squat” on the property (the lower condo, in my case) for 10 continuous years, without the legal owners there. I guess I that won’t work, because I’m only 9-months old……Then what? Oh, wait! 9-months in dog years is more than 10 YEARS in hu-man year. Ha! Maybe I have a case.

Mom says I should “work it out” with the kitties and that might keep them from evicting me. Hmmm, do you think they’ll give me a settlement offer? Well, I think I’ll offer them some terms of my own:

  • Rights to the lower condo during the day (they can have it all night),
  • Slapping me is not allowed while a cat is in the penthouse and I’m in the condo,
  • Equal division in upkeep–I won’t cough up a hairball if they won’t. Oh, wait. I don’t have hairballs–I’m a DOG. Well, how about…no hairballs from them and I won’t leave acorns in the condo.
  • An unobstructed view to the outside. (Kitties can’t sit on the windowsill.)

I think that’s more than fair. So, now it’s a waiting game. I wonder if they will come back with a counter-offer or accept my terms? I bet they’ll accept them–they secretly really like me.

16 thoughts on “I’m being EVICTED?

  1. Wow- Good for you for being a pacifist. Kirby is definitely on the aggressive side when it comes to the cat. He’s evicted the cat from the whole downstairs part of the house! The cat is trying out his squatter rules, but Kirby just isn’t having it!

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  2. They duss say posseshun do be 9/10th of the law so I think that means you need to stay in the condo fur furever to put your claims on it. Would the kittehs like that? I say they leave well enuff alone and let you has it part-time udderwise, you has no choice but to stay there furever and ever. They had better be carefuls wot they wish fur.

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  3. I think those are perfectly reasonable terms; especially since the cats have that killer loft in the kitchen, too. I mean, really – isn’t a dog allowed a perch with a bit of a view, too? (Although we’re a bit scared of cats – our late big brother bossed us around pretty good, and I STILL refuse to go upstairs, which was ‘his floor’ of the house – who knows – his ghost might be up there and will smack me if I invade his space…). Good luck!

    *kissey face*
    -Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

    PeeEss: We are engaged in shameless self-promotion; if you haven’t voted for Abby’s Hippobottomus tag and would like to offer your support, we’d love your vote (it’s on the right side-bar): http://www.fetchingtags.net/blog/contests/ Thanks!

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  4. I was thinking about your dilemma, Sage, and I believe I have come up with a solution. You should offer to share your antler with them. I’m sure they would be impressed with your generosity.

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  5. I shouldn’t worry to much about not being allowed to go to the attorney’s office, I think it would be a very boring place to go if there are no dogs allowed.

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